sigh..

im in trouble...
something happened that ive always told myself to avoid, but it happened anyway.

falling for a friend...

its a terrible feeling. because i know i shouldnt...but, as often is the case, feelings of the heart transcend all logic and reason. but that doesnt make it any easier. in fact, i think it makes it worse...
i'd rather be rejected by a stranger 10 times over than be in this situation now..

ah, then of course theres the infamous ladder theory (see "ladder theory" post below). dont wanna wind up in the abyss.

damn it. cant study.. cant concentrate.. this is driving me crazy!